can't sleep

Ok...so it is almost midnight, and as my title fully explains, I cannot sleep...nor have I been able to sleep for the past two months...and it is really starting to get to me. Now, there are several reasons why I cannot sleep (and some of them I'm not going to go into detail about).

I'm a worrier. I worry all the time. I worry about school, work, church, friends, family, finances, my car, my niece, the neighbors next door. I worry about getting my homework assignments done on time, getting my taxes done, paying my next tuition payment. I worry about my next appointment in counseling, about dating (or the fact that I'm not dating), being social, balancing work and play. I worry that I don't belong, or I'm inadequate, or that I'm just making a total fool out of myself.

The list could go on and on, but I won't make anyone suffer through reading it. As you can see, I have a lot that I worry about (and probably half of it I shouldn't worry about). To top it off, I worry about not being able to sleep...Am I losing my mind?

Another reason I haven't been sleeping is because of bad dreams/nightmares, or even dreams that aren't necessarily bad, but just overall freak me out...you know, those ones that feel so real, even though they are so farfetched. Your subconscious mind is telling you that what you are experiencing isn't real, that it is just a dream...but, at the same time your unconscious mind is doing everything it can convince you that it is real. Dag nabbit, my mind is conspiring against me. If I'm not going crazy, then I'm already there.

Anywho, those dreams happen every night and that causes two reactions from me: (1) I wake up and can't go back to sleep, and (2) I become more and more afraid of going to sleep. You see my predicament here?

Well, that's about all my sleep-deprived mind can muster up at the moment. I will probably read this post in the morning and wonder what the heck was I thinking. And, yes, this will probably be yet another thing to worry about. What was the point of this post again...